  |
2010-10-21 22:42 Larry Holdaway can deal with a maximum daily capacity of 200 GSU (Gross Stupidity Units), and can safely filter up to 14 IAE (Insensitive Asshole Encounters) per week. Surplus GSU and unfiltered IAE are converted to WRP* (Withheld Rage Packets), which are then stored until such time as they can be safely disposed of**. If WRPs are allowed to accumulate for too long (either due to a lack of disposal opportunities, or an unexpected surge in GSU and/or IAE), an exponential increase in the likelihood of a HOLY-FUCK-I-WANT-TO-KILL-YOU-ALL-YOU-STUPID-MOTHERFUCKERS may occur. 2010-09-30 14:12 Student kills self after roommate posts footage of him having sex with a man I've been stewing over this one since I first heard about it the other day. It makes me angry: angry that it's still culturally acceptable to ridicule someone because of their sexual orientation (whether real, implied or suspected)... angry at the people who spread intolerance, in the name of "family values" and religion. Fuck you. Fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOU! Another dead kid, thanks to a sub-set of our society teaching kids that it's shameful to be gay. 2010-08-28 06:23 Well, I find myself in China again. Work, work, work, work! I'm not complaining, I know I'm fortunate to even have a job these days (let alone get to visit China on someone else's dime)... but regardless, I can't wait to get home. I have a profusion of art projects and photo-shoots filling up my skull, and I'm itching to get started. The Great Firewall has completely cut off access to Facebook (If you're reading this on Facebook, then my blog forwarding still works... yay!). It's sad how depended I've become on FB for basic access to my friends and random entertainment. I didn't even notice it happening. Now that it's gone (even temporarily), I find myself jonesing for it. I'm sorry LJ, I've neglected you. Please believe me, it's not you... it's me. I'm not asking for forgiveness. We had a great time, and maybe someday we can work it out. I certainly wouldn't rule out the occasional bootie call. Here are some random pics from the last two weeks.         Any friends out there who have offered to model for me (or have already modeled for me, or have even considered modeling for me)... I'm booking photo-shoots as soon as I get back. I have a range of projects in mind. Send me an email and I'll fill you in. It turns out that I can't escape Lady Gaga... even in China. -Lars 2010-01-25 17:27 2010-01-06 17:07 Haven't been around the interwebs very much lately. Life has been oscillating between terribly exciting and terribly terrible for the last few months. Attempting to remain sane, attempting to make art, attempting to tread water. My apologies if I have seemed distracted (or even absent). I had an opportunity to shoot my friend Brooke the other day. While I no longer consider myself a photographer, I will still gladly pull out the camera gear to shoot photos for a friend, especially one who is willing to collaborate and bring some of their own energy to the table. Here is some of what we came up with:     More on my portfolio site here: http://larryholdaway.com/photography/brooke-chains/ The shoot started out rather silly and campy, but as we neared the end, and we had already covered all of the shots she needed, we started to riff on the use of the chains (which I had brought along purely as an after-thought). Out of that, something dark and uncomfortable evolved, a meditation on the horrible depths that love/obsession can drag one into. The photos we intended to shoot turned out fine, and worked great for the client, but as I was editing, I kept coming back to these images instead. There is an uneasy undercurrent in ... 2009-08-22 11:06 Drove up to Seattle to see my sister. 2530 miles in 5 days (43 hours of road-time, round trip). Not too shabby, considering first 700 miles or so were on Highway 1, up the California coast. A beautiful drive, the Pacific Ocean on the left, miles and miles of forest and farmland on the right. Lunch at a small, quiet restaurant tucked into the woods by the ocean. Across the Golden Gate Bridge and more coastline. A plunge into the redwoods, winding canyon roads, the deep, green darkness of ancient forest, old magic... up, over and through the mountains. Good to get away, to spend time with my sister, to morn with her over the loss of Eli, her little baby boy. Tears, hugs, and quiet, thoughtful conversation. Tears again at writing this, and again at reading it. A forest walk with her beautiful children. Some insights into our family, and my sometimes awkward place in it. A bit of guilt at not contacting any of our amazing Seattle friends while in town. The trip is about family, no time/energy to socialize. I'll make it up to you later. The long, monotonous drive back to Los Angeles, down Interstate 5. Angie asleep in the passenger seat. An impromptu detour to visit our tattoo artist at his new shop in Berkeley, CA. More thoughtful conversation. Hours of road time afterward to meditate on (re)surfacing ideas, to reconsider priorities, and contemplate new paths. Up the Grapevine, through the high mountain pass. Used to go camping up here, when I was a kid. When was I ever a kid? Always so mature, always so responsible. The burden of the eldest son, of a dedicated, hard working father. Down the mountain and back to all too familiar territory. Home. Work email is waiting. It will wait. A quarter of my life spent working there, it will wait. Sleep. Wake. Return the rental car. Walk back home, in early morning silence. Breathe. Breathe in the ... 2009-07-09 00:15  I apologize if I have not been responsive to your comments, IMs, emails, calls, etc. An impending deadline at work is occupying every waking moment. Everything has started to slip... I even had to cancel my wrist surgery. I wish I could say that it will be over soon, but it is now likely that there will be, at least, an additional month added. Please bear with me in this ill-defined meantime between now and when I get my life back. Okay, back to work. 2009-06-03 23:54 It's been a day... or two. Yesterday, my sister, Stacey, lost her baby in the womb. She was 30 weeks pregnant. Today, she went into surgery, had the baby removed, and held her son for the first and last time. I find myself unable to articulate how sorrow-filled this has left me. My sister is the sweetest, most empathic soul I have ever known, and the thought of her in such physical and emotional distress left me crouched in a corner behind the office, sobbing. Today was spent on the phone, trying to get details, and figuring out who is going to fly up to help take care of things. This, of course, occurs in the midst of crunch-time. For those not in the know, this defines the period of time during a project when sleep, family and fun become and unaffordable luxury, where twelve hours in the office makes you look like a slacker. Yeah, take one for the team, you know? Because making a video game is worth losing everything: your friends, your family, your soul. E3 is this week and I'm not going. "Why?" you ask... Well, because ONE, there's too much work to do, and TWO, I really don't care anymore. Okay, so I'm venting. A bit. But I'm coping. I'm eating right. I'm working out. I'm getting my blood-pressure under control. Angie and I are taking long walks every evening. Like tonight. We took a vigorous walk up the steep street that leads from our house toward CalArts. A good, sweaty, vigorous walk. The kind of walk where you start to remember how good your life is. At the top of the hill, there's a little, concrete bench, overlooking the local community college. We take a breather, listen to the school clock's chime and continue on our walk. I'm not sure what we were talking about, but whatever it was, I was caught completely off-guard by the large cup of frozen yogurt that slammed into me. Apparently, the source of this projectile dessert, was the car full of teenagers that had just ... |
Contact
- Email: larry.holdaway
gmail.com - Twitter: @larryholdaway
- Facebook: Larry P. Holdaway
Random Selections
All works Copyright © 2003-2012
Larry P. Holdaway
Larry P. Holdaway